random loose threads

[driftsintobuffetline]

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2016
January 29 - Returning from Submarining
February 13 - What are you thoughts on MARRIAGE?
February 16 - Day 1, Soviet Occupied Import Cities
March 12 - They were supposed to talk about Miles and Greg, but talked about themselves instead
April 14th - Kinks, Tatts, and Power Suppression
June - Admiring the Ring
July 27 - Hermann's New Car
After the Kaiju Test - Need a New Apartment

Comments

[mathemagier]

"No, no, nothing to be concerned about," he assured, straightening up a bit in his seat. "I'm sure you'll like it. ..Probably."

Though now that he thought about it, part of it wasn't strictly accurate. Would Newton focus on that, or enjoy the general message? It was a simple gift- what if Newton's was nicer? He'd told Dr. Brown it wasn't a competition and it wasn't, but now of course he was having second thoughts.

Newton should like it. He should. Perhaps he'd even be as delighted and flattered as he'd imagined.

Suddenly nervous, he nudged the box to Newton's side of the table. "Our food will be a bit. Perhaps we'll open them together then?"

[driftsintobuffetline]

"Babe, I'm sure I'll like it."

He eagerly pulled the box closer until it was in front of him, fingers itching to tear into the paper. The paper was pretty, classy, not too gaudy. Very Hermann, if Hermann was valentine paper.

"On three. One. Two. ....Three."

Though he wanted to watch Hermann's reaction, Newt focused on his own gift and made short work of the box.

The mug he eased out of the tissue paper was perfect. Hilarious and perfect and flattering, considering Hermann was not frequently one to say such things publicly. Hot Married Biology Teacher. He laughed and turned pink, flattered and pleased at the compliment, amused to think of it in the context of his own professor kink. Could they put his drink in this? He'd have to ask when the waitress came back around. Newt was definitely showing this off.

My husband thinks I'm hot~

[mathemagier]

He couldn't help but watch Newton's reaction, smiling to himself and relaxing as his husband seemed to enjoy the gift as much as he hoped he might. Hermann turned his attention to the papers in his hands, pulling on his glasses to peer at them with improved visibility.

"Free breakfast in bed, hm? How generous." A few more 'coupons' read the same except one that he was grateful not to have read aloud. A passs for any sexual favor by the looks of it. Hermann's brows rose. And there was more by the looks of it.

He pulled out a few bottles of paint, or so he assumed by the paintbrushes that accompanied them. Puzzled, he pulled one color closer to read it. He was not an artist by nature..

Edible paint. Ah. Hermann colored a bit. Well he knew what they were doing tonight then. He hoped it didn't taste awful.

But there was one more thing left in the little suspicious bag. A small box.. Hermann drew it out with a dubious look to Newton and opened it with care.

A remote dial? And a note: You're the only one who turns me on It took a few moments for the implications of it to sink in. If his face was warm before, it was positively burning now. Somewhere likely intimate, there was a device attached to Newton's body that was controlled by this remote. He stared at it, wondering if perhaps they should have waited after all.

Pocketing the remote, he worked to regain his composure as he put everything else back in the bag.

"You're really asking to be tormented this evening."

[driftsintobuffetline]

Newt managed to almost look innocent, toying with the mug in his hands as Hermann uncovered each layer of the present. Almost, but never actually innocent.

"What?" he said, feigning ignorance of what Hermann was talking about. "I thought you could use a few tattoos of your own--temporary tattoos, mind you. Or maybe you'd like to update some of mine--your choice." He ran a finger along the edge of the mug, looking smug. "And it's not like I don't already make you breakfast half the time. What's generous about changing the location, really."

Their waitress was passing by, stopped to bring them their drinks...all the while eyeing Hermann's blushing face with some concern and then apparently deciding not to ask. Newt asked her about the mug. She informed him she'd get it washed and they could transfer his drink into it.

Newt shifted forward and leaned over the table to lower his voice. "I'm not asking for anything. I'm just giving you the tools to make your own decision."

[mathemagier]

Hermann didn't look up until their waitress had gone, and tried to glare at Newton through the violent hue that had taken over his expression. He was keenly aware of the dial in his pocket and, suffering through Newton's grin, felt fully justified in switching it on.

"In that case, my decisions may not allow you to make it through dinner."

[driftsintobuffetline]

It sounded like a phone set to vibrate. It was definitely NOT a phone, and Newt gasped and sat up straighter in his seat, a look of surprise in his eyes as the vibrating plug came to life.

As was the case with many of Newt's decisions (especially regarding Hermann), he may not have thought this one through all the way.

He very gingerly settled back into his seat, wiggling a bit and looking sheepishly around, ears pink. The discomfort and embarrassment was evident.

"...Are you mad? Did I ruin this or are you just--should I get our food to go? Did I screw up?"

[mathemagier]

It was viscerally satisfying to see the shoe on the other foot. Newton's embarrassment was a balm for his own.

Hermann sat up, color fading, and spine shivering through a ghost of sensation teasing the Drift. Suddenly he had a much better idea of what the actual device was. If he turned it up too high, they'd both suffer distraction. He dialed it back down a smidgen.

"Not upset, no- only a touch vengeful," he assured, sipping his tea and offering their waitress a smile as she returned with Newton's washed mug. "You brought this on yourself you know."

[driftsintobuffetline]

With the reassurance that he hadn't ruined the evening, Newt could be pleased at the ghost Drift response to the vibrations in Hermann. Despite his own embarrassment, he squirmed, inviting the plug deeper, the low but steady vibrating teasing his nerves. When it buzzed inside him, he wanted Hermann to feel as much of it as possible.

Newt squeaked a thank you to the waitress and transferred the drink as she left.

"You're the worst. I don't know why I give you gifts," he grumbled as if this wasn't the intended or at least expected outcome when he first decided to wear it. Speaking of outcomes, Newt fished into his pocket and produced a keycard for a small hotel. It was nothing fancy, but it was nearby. "I knew I should have bought the fuzzy handcuffs instead, but I figured you might be cruel enough to handcuff me to the table and leave me here."

[mathemagier]

A blush threatened as Newton seemed to be trying to share sensation across their Drift. Hermann shifted in his seat, clearing his throat. Just the fact that Newton had something inside him was beginning to work him up. Newton had taken the time to stretch himself already..

He eyed the keycard with raised brows. "Now what good would you be to me if I left you here?"

Perhaps they wouldn't finish their meal here after all.

[driftsintobuffetline]

He wanted to be very good to Hermann. Very useful. He wanted Hermann to lavish him with attention and he wanted him to enjoy Newt in every manner he would. And, alright, he'd optimistically thought they could get through dinner like civilized adults, but he also didn't think they'd be opening their gifts before their drinks even came.

At this rate, Newt might come before dinner did.

"I figure you've always wanted to ditch me somewhere embarrassing. Probably especially now that you're stuck with me til death do we part. Honestly, I always figured you'd someday tie my hands to the headboard with my tie and just... 'Bye, Newton.'""

[mathemagier]

Hermann considered that, drumming his fingers on the table and suddenly restless.

"Is that something you want?" He could see tying Newton to the headboard and leaving him for an undetermined amount of time to suffer the sweetest torment, leave him suspended in anticipation and uncertainty. "Because that could be arranged."

Though at first glance, it didn't seem to be a good idea. Newton's underlying worries about abandonment- but perhaps marriage had tempered them somewhat? Perhaps he simply trusted he'd return?

"Though tonight of course, I'm just going to take you to the hotel and ravish you there."

[driftsintobuffetline]

Hermann knew him too well. While he did trust Hermann now he had also been speaking generally, about the chance to ditch Newt somewhere and how that would have been tempting to Hermann for years. Not even the allure of the phrase 'that could be arranged' (god, Hermann always sounded so wonderfully wicked when he said it like that) could undo the underlying fear that was stirring in the back of his mind. Not even the promise of ravishing later could actually exorcise the anxiety now bleeding into his system.

"No," he said frankly, foregoing German for English again. He took a long drink out of the mug. "It's not really something we need to do. The tie thing, I mean. I--" Self-consciousness got the better of him and he hid behind the German again. "I meant I figured it was something you'd always wanted to do to me. Always--before. I... I don't even mean sexily. Just. 'Newton, you're being unbearable.' Like, if I've been a real turd to you that day--maybe not now, maybe," that sounded only half certain, "...but before, when we worked together. Like a timeout. And then you'd have ditched me in the Mess Hall with my wrist cuffed to a table." Which would have more than embarrassed him. How unwanted could he possibly be! Not even his only colleague wants to be around him. Ditched in the Mess Hall like an unwanted dog!

His fidgeting now had less to do with the thing inside him and more to do with repressed anxieties surfacing.

You would come back for me now, right? he thought. "You ...wouldn't do it publicly now, right?"

[mathemagier]

Taking pity on the man, Hermann switched the dial off and instead focused on assuaging the fear creeping into the Drift. He reached across the table to still Newton's fingers, then switched to English for emphasis.

"Newton, I'd never willingly leave you anywhere. Perhaps I'd entertained the thought of barring the entryway to the lab or having you shipped off to a different Shatterdome before. None of those ever went so far as to suggest cuffing you in the Mess, however. I'm not so terribly creative. I certainly don't have any such intentions now. If ever I leave you, it will be either involuntary or by your own request, I promise."

[driftsintobuffetline]

It was so honest. The confession that, yes, as suspected, he'd have loved to be rid of Newt once upon a time, but that it'd never extended to this particular method (that was all in Newt's head. thank you, brain) and that it was no longer a wish now. Hermann owned up to the truth of the past, didn't try to sugar coat it.

"I know. Logically, I-I know, even if sometimes my brain hasn't gotten the message because it's being dumb." He picked up his chair and shuffled it around the table until he was parked next to his husband. "I love you and I know I need to hear it way too often, but honest, Hermann, I appreciate it every time you repeat it for me. Thank you." He leaned up and kissed Hermann's cheek. "Don't leave. I don't care what I say. You're my best friend and I never want to be without you again."

[mathemagier]

Looping an arm around Newton's shoulders, Hermann pressed a kiss to his forehead.

"I love you, Newton," he said just in case. His arm lowered to encircle his waist. "I know I don't say so enough, but when I do, know that I mean it with utmost sincerity. That in that given moment, I can think of nothing more articulate or sincere to express as much. And occasionally, it still feels woefully inadequate. I can only hope the Drift can communicate even half of the affection I'm struck with at times."

[driftsintobuffetline]

He took Hermann's hand, holding it under the table in a private, if obvious, bond.

"The Drift says a lot. It'll never replace actually hearing it, and I enjoy hearing it, but ...you're never inadequate with your affection. Okay? Every little bit is another piece of you you're willing to share with me and that's everything I need. I mean, don't get me wrong, I love attention and I will soak up every little bit of stupid attention you give me--good or bad--but I also love you and I just. I get it. It's not easy. I want all of it, I've wanted all of it for longer than I realize, but you could put your affection out there like a carrot on a string and I'd STILL be happy with what you gave me."

He laughed softly.

"I honestly don't know how to communicate it either, man, if we're being honest right now. I buy you stuff and, well. Do things. And just hope it says what gets otherwise kind of lost in my constant verbal vomit."

[mathemagier]

"Your actions speak plenty," he assured. "You are endlessly considerate- and much too forgiving."

Newton didn't mean it that way, but his husband's willingness to accept any scrap of love and affection no matter how small distressed him. In hindsight, it almost felt like precisely what he was doing- meting out doses of love and affection as the mood struck. Newton deserved so much more than it felt he could offer at times. Someone that didn't need to give him a flattering mug to make up for his verbal shortcomings.

The gift suddenly felt contrived and insincere. He'd buy him something better tomorrow.

"..Well, do let me know if there's anything you'd like me to improve on."

[driftsintobuffetline]

Through the Drift he felt vibrations if things that spoke of guilt and distress, so Newt tugged him close and kissed his cheek again.

"Marriage has turned your views on me rather rosy, dude. I doubt I'm nearly as patient or considerate as you think I am."

The waitress returned with their plates and Newt thanked her, then returned his attention to Hermann.

"But if we want to talk improvements...how about you tell me what's bothering you instead of making me puzzle it out through the Drift?"

[mathemagier]

Sometimes the Drift was too revealing, but that was just an aspect of their relationship really. Hermann prodded his food with a fork.

"Well first of all, when it comes to my disability, you are very much patient and considerate of me, and I'm grateful for that."

The Drift came in handy then; Newton knew when he was in pain, feeling weak, having difficulty concentrating, or just growing tired. He knew not to press him, encouraged him to rest, and quietly offered his assistance where needed. That level of understanding and consideration was priceless.

"But really, it's nothing new. You may worry about taking too much, but I'm not certain I give enough for that to be a possibility."

[driftsintobuffetline]

"I know this might come as a surprise, considering we've spent the better part of our history talking--in varying ways--but I actually like talking to you. There's give and take there, Hermann, and contrary to your assumptions, it IS balanced. Your silences are as potent as your words and your words are definitely quality over quantity. I for one get value out of our discussions. You telling me you think I just talk to you to pass time?"

He stole some of Hermann's food cheekily.

"But if you feel there's imbalance, what're you suggesting we do about it?" He grinned. "You think I'm going to shut up?"

[mathemagier]

Newton was sweet, and Hermann loved him very much. It was all he could do to smile at him then lean in to kiss his nose.

"Of course not. I just want you happy, Newton. You don't deserve anything less."

[driftsintobuffetline]

"I'm happy," he answered softly, one hand coming to rest on Hermann's knee. "You make me happy. Now please eat your dinner before it gets cold, babe. I want you to be happy, too, and I'm not dealing with you being grumpy about a cold dinner when there are better things we can do with our night."

[mathemagier]

It would have to be enough for now. So long as Newton was happy, there was no need to worry, and the Drift was still abuzz with shared affection and sincerity.

Hermann pat the hand on his knee then turned to his food.

"Well let's eat so we can get on with that more exciting part of the evening, shall we?"

And now that arousal had cooled, actually finishing dinner seemed like a realistic possibility.

[driftsintobuffetline]

He smiled to himself and kept his hand in place, using the other to wield his fork, pick up his glass, and so forth. Arousal buzz or no, he very much liked the subtle contact. In general, he really liked being seated next to Hermann versus across the table, and wondered why they hadn't thought to do that before, why all the waitstaff everywhere ever always seated couples across from each other. With music or general crowd noise in some of these places, it was way too loud. It was much more conducive to talking and conspiring and being couplish to sit next to each other or at connected sides of one corner. So what if movies and pictures preferred the across-the-table romantic setup?

"I don't know. Dinner's pretty exciting. 'Later' has a lot to measure up to."

[mathemagier]

Hermann settled in with a matching smile, the touch just intimate enough to hold his interest while remaining tame. 'Exciting', hm?

"Perhaps it does," he agreed, thinking of the remote tucked between their thighs. But really, they should try to enjoy their meal first. When they started to linger over it, perhaps.

"But I must say you've laid out a few interesting promises."